My Family

July 6, 2025:

When the Fourth of July lands on a long weekend, as it has this year, for many it means vacation getaways, grill-outs with family and friends, pool parties and picnics, often finished off with sparklers, bottle rockets, or a full-on fireworks display. At one time, this was a major holiday for my family, and we often had full-on celebrations with our closest friends.

Nowadays, dynamics with my family are different. Full day celebrations have been reconfigured to cross-checking each other’s schedules and trying to align time with friends and their schedules. Life happens, and you learn to adjust.

This year, even more significant family transitions have come into play. Ava spent the holiday weekend down the shore with her boyfriend and his family. Julianna, who just turned 21, has been exploring her freedom of being an adult with hangouts and get togethers with her friends. My day of Independence was, for the most part, quiet and relaxing…with a few unexpected duds thrown into the mix.

My gas grill ran out of propane midway through making dinner. The canvas grill cover tore on the grill handle and ripped in half as I was shutting down the useless grill for the night. I attempted to invite my neighbors over to hang out for cocktails later in the evening on the deck, but the noise of firecrackers and other low-level explosives throughout the neighborhood caused my dog, Theo, to have some panic attacks. Cocktails and laughter on the deck were traded in for me curling up on the sofa with Theo, catching up on Netflix.

As I sat on the sofa, dwelling over losing my own day’s independence while the neighborhood skyrockets continued to explode throughout the night, it made me wonder…has my Independence Day sparkler fizzled out? As a society that focuses so much on what everyone else is up to through social media, it’s easy for us to get locked in on and believing that we also must be part of the festivities. I’ve gotten caught up many times in this weird web. I’ve put a lot of personal work and dedication into learning how to deal with such moments, and this go-around was another reminder that life will continue to transition and throw unexpected changes my way. It’s something that we all must deal with at various times.

Once I was finally able to accept the day’s various curve balls, I decided to not follow that path for the remainder of the holiday weekend. I started July 5 on my own terms with a nice visit to my new favorite farmer’s market. Sipping on a locally brewed coffee while shopping amongst the local vendors has become my new way of enjoying my weekend. It was this freedom that I needed to help reignite my appreciation for the holiday weekend that almost wasn’t.

And while I didn’t get together this year on Independence Day with my closest friends as we have for so many years previously, we instead met up for dinner on Saturday night at our new favorite local restaurant, followed up with drinks and lots of great conversation and laughter for many hours afterwards on their deck.

Life’s lesson this go-around: don’t let the unexpected shut you down. Be with those moments, acknowledge it and accept it. Then start the next day off with a bang.

Let freedom reign!